letters to grace

Dear Grace,

Hello my sweet baby girl. Daddy and I miss you so much! It’s crazy to think that you would be nearly 4 years old now. I often wonder what you would look like – would you look like me or daddy? what kind of stuff would you be into? I really wish I could hear your voice, or your laugh, just once. It would be music to my ears!

I gave away most of your things once Daddy and I decided not to have any more children. A lot of it was baby equipment, and went to one of your Daddy’s cousins. It’s nice to know another family can enjoy them. I kept most of the clothes, and all of the blankets. I still have your crib too, and I thought I would keep it forever, but now I’m thinking maybe I should give it to someone in need. Perhaps Lisa and Ash could use it; they are expecting baby #5 in January.

It’s nice to be so close to Daddy’s side of the family, but we feel we would be much happier if we lived in the cities. We are currently on a waiting list for disabled housing in Minneapolis. We have no idea how long it will be until we actually get to move though. We just signed our fifth lease here at the apartment.

I’m happy to tell you that your Grandma Mary and Grandpa Greg have a picture of you displayed in their house, right next to photos of your cousins. Pretty cool, huh?

Daddy and I have a new doctor that we see in the cities, and he is just great. Very kind and compassionate; I think you would like him. He’s actually your Grandma Shell’s doctor too!

Your Uncle Toni and Aunt Nikki got married last summer. Although we didn’t get to attend the wedding, we are thrilled that she is officially part of our family now! We just adore her.

Uncle Tim and Aunt Sarah recently bought a house. We see them from time to time, usually on the holidays.

Aunt Laura and Uncle Dan are doing well. She always remembers you on your birthday, and lights a candle for you.

We had a lovely week-long vacation in The Dells this summer. We had such a good time, and were even able to go to a water park. I always miss you at times like that, when it’s a big family gathering. Especially when all your cousins are there.

Your cousin Daniel is three now, and he’s talking up a storm. I always imagined you two would be the best friends, since you were born just four months apart.

Oh my beautiful Grace, I love you so. I think about you every single day, and I know your Daddy does too. We aren’t as sad as we used to be, and we don’t cry as often, but that doesn’t mean we’re “over” you. You’ll always be the missing piece of our family puzzle. We’ll always have that Grace-sized hole in our hearts.

I can feel your presence on occasion. Usually around May, on Mother’s day and my birthday. I didn’t see any butterflies then though. I did, however, see one in June, around Father’s Day and Daddy’s birthday. He said you visited him in his dreams.

I hope that, wherever you are, you get to see Grandpa Ray, and your Great Grandmother Betty.

I often receive compliments about my memorial tattoo. People tell me how beautiful they think it is, and I love it, because it gives me a chance to talk about you. And that’s a gift to me.

I love you so much baby girl. You’re forever in my heart and on my mind.

Love Always,
Momma ❤

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