I cannot believe that I am disabled at age 35. Or that Jim was at like 20 or so.
I mean, I understand why. But when one thinks about one being disabled, one may imagine that “label” applying to an older person.
It’s just not what I expected in life ! At all. I used to bust my ass in the salon, working 10 hour shifts, and then go out and party at night.
Now I can barely stand up long enough to do one haircut.
I don’t go out partying ; I haven’t been to my favorite club in 5 years.
I’ve always felt independent and free spirited. Now I am dependent and not so free to do what I like, let alone what I want my body to do.
I have recently been diagnosed with an auto immune disease called Sjogren’s Sndrome. Some of the side effects I have include: dry mouth, joint pain, memory loss,peripheral neuropathy, fatigue, and heartburn.
I have arthritis and fibromyalgia.
I have no cartilage in my left knee. I need knee replacement surgery, and I have been refused by 2 different medical facilities. I currently walk with a cane.
However, I am getting a brace that allegedly mimics the surgery. It could give me a great deal of pain relief.
I am a neat freak with OCD. I like to keep our apartment super clean.
I am really starting to struggle with getting the basics done around here. I get tired so easily, and it hurts a lot.
Jim has been telling me, since we got married, that he qualifies for assistance with housework through one of the programs he’s part of. I have resisted for a long time because I’m weird about strangers in my house.( and because I’m a bit of a control freak)
It’s finally time for me to get over it and get some help.
I admit it; I’m disabled, and I can’t do it all.
It’s going to be okay, right?!